Of My NeverLand
Its been raining all morning through the afternoon.The wind is chillded and the air crisped.Like the winter's chill still new on a cheerful morning in spring.It feels exactly that nowadays,always raining.Its the rainy season,and so it begins here and now.

Everytime right before a rain when the wind is still blowing and the curtains are still flying,my family would be scrambling all over the house closing windows,pulling in the wet clothes and closing toilet doors.Its a busy scene indeed,for a minute or two.The big glass doors on my balcony are normally taken care of by me.They are huge and old,and they are not the easiest doors to close in the world.Im sure there's something stuck underneath the doors that's causing all the difficulty in closing it.Its probably those toy cars i used to play,but you never know.Ive told Dad to change them a million time,but of course its not really that urgent a matter to attend to.

The wind already picked up,and i could see plastic bags flying through the air between the block opposite and mine.I took a firm grasp at the edge of the glass and pulled with all my might.The doors moved,but wouldnt close.It left a gap of about fifteen centimetres apart."Well,screw it." i thought.Standing by the windows as the wind blasted its way through,the small droplets of rain splattered onto my face and blurred my vision for a while.Then i realised,that i used to love doing that when i was young.Everytime it rains,i would carry my toy box to the gap between the doors and play.I dont know why,but the feeling of wind blowing against the side of my face was great.I used to put my head between the doors and let the wind blow my hair around as i admired the power of mother nature.Neighbours frantically closing their windows and tshirts flying everywhere.Kids jumping up and down in their pajamas when the rain comes pouring down,and women trying to keep their skirts down as they scrambled through the streets.Haha,it was fun watching those as my face got soaked.Come to think about it,when was the last time i did something like that.Something i used to love as a kid.

I used to remain in the comforts of my blanket on Saturday and Sunday mornings,even when the sunlight already crawled up my butt.Its just that period of time,from the moment you open your eyes to the time when you are finally willing to crawl out of bed.I used to remain there,thinking about things.Not really asleep,but not too awake either.Simply staring into space and building castles in the sky.Mom has a book called,"Its Good to Idle Once in a While".Of course,its in chinese.That was perhaps the worst translation ever.But anyway,i guess its true sometimes.I loved to idle,and i love to just lie in my bed and waste the morning away.When was the last time i did that?

Somehow,so many things that i used to do in my childhood days are gone.Im not sure if this is part of puberty.If there's a definition for puberty,i wonder if it involves the stripping of childhood likings.Yeah,for some reason i do understand why the kids desired NeverLand so much in Peter Pan.The most innocent joy remains,while cheap thrills stay at bay.Its just the pace of my every day life that is making me sick.Losing all the things that i love to do,the people soon enough,and so many other things.Feel like screaming vulgarities into the wind and point a middle finger at my neighbours while im at it.Its a way to get free and let go.

Dellia(Awesome name isnt it?) said that my posts are full of anger nowadays.Well,maybe its the fullstops.I type too formally?I dont know.Maybe im just too pissed,but i dont know why.Im just angry,but for so apparent reasons.Being stripped of my innocence,robbed of the childhood dreams and joy might perhaps explain what's happening.Everything's got an explaination,right?Well,just another moody post on a moody night.Staring at the million citylights were fun.Joining the dots and making out shapes from the lines that ive drawn with thin air was stupidly fun.I took a time off from my Econs MCQ a while ago and just joined the yellow streetlights below,which seemed like yellow diamonds strewn across a pitch black ocean.Its times like these,that i should appreciate life a little more.That is my Neverland i guess.Where everything stops,and everything goes.

Song of the Moment---The Space Between by Dave Matthews Band