Of the Quarter Life Crisis
I shall apologise for my absence.I guess i havent been able to type anything these couple of days.Not that i dont have the mood whatsoever.Its just that i havent been able to put what i felt into words.It has been a mess.A big fat one.And now im in school typing this entry during a long 1 hour break that i have.Its a transitional period for me.Some might like to call it the Quarter Life Crisis.No,not a Mid-Life Crisis.A Quarter Life Crisis.It normally occurs when you are near your twenties when the fear of stepping out into the society looms ahead.When decisions you make now are going to affect the rest of your natural life,which in turn determines whether or not you'll have a Mid Life Crisis at all.
 
Lets think about it this way.There are three sort of people around me right now.All of them are experiencing the same problem as i am.Which is:To be trapped within this annoying educational system which judges students only on their academic achievements.Well,there's nothing much i can do about that can i?(Well,i can start a riot or something)Anyway,the three sort of people are:
 
1)The ones who are sick of their current lives,but are living with it.Perhaps not happily,but willingly.
2)The ones who are sick of their current lives,and cannot stand them any longer.
3)The ones who are clueless about their current situations.
 
I probably belong to the second batch.I cannot stand my life now.But the worst thing is,what the hell can i do about it?Perhaps i couldve done something if i realised my little mistake a few months earlier.That period of time has come and gone,and now im forced to go through it altogether.Fine.I just had a good chat with my Economics Tutor,Mr Teo.He's a nice chap.Though he might be naggy at some point,but he does make some sense.Unlike Mr Yee who makes no sense out of anything.Dont get me wrong.Both of them are nice people.But one of them is just more knowledgeable and intellectual than the other.Anyway,he was saying how he was disappointed in my results because he had hopes in me.Something about the "Potential" that is within.Oh well,i dont see it.But if he sees it,i'll take it as an encouraging thought.Yeah,it certainly is.For me,at least.Of course we talked about more stuff around the little green table before the teachers' office.Enlightenment?To a certain degree.After all,Ive already heard all that he said from my mother.Chinese version,that is.
 
If school teachers are crazy,then Primary School teachers are definitely the mad ones.Not that we can blame them anyway.Kids asking to go to the toilets,screaming kids,kids shooting rubberbands at each other,kids doing their businesses on their shorts or skirts.You get loads of those.Which makes them forget about their basic principals of being a teacher.A good one.Which is,being understanding.Ever been called "Stupid" by a Primary School teacher before?Haha.I certainly did.When i was too lazy to punch holes in my English worksheets,i poked the holes through the worksheets and filed them in the file.The teacher saw it,called me a "Stupid Boy" and slammed the file on my head.(And that student from that whatever Primary School actually sued the principal for slapping her with a soft cover textbook?)It doesnt feel good to be called stupid.Especially from someone whom you know is always right.I mean,back then the teachers are the supreme powers other than your parents and your elder brothers and sisters right.They are the ones who go "No","Yes","Now" and "Later".And the small little you comply to all their commands just like that.I felt really stupid yesterday night for some reason.And the worst thing is,i dont seem to care about the fact that i felt that way.Perhaps im getting used to it.Thats kinda bad,isnt it?Is that how people feel during a Quarter Life Crisis?Yikes.Im feeling old already.And its scaring the living daylight out of me.Sucking it out one by one,bit by bit.
 
Quotes of the Day:
Jules," The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."
 
Esmeralda,"What is your name?"
Butch,"Butch."
Esmeralda,"What does it mean?"
Butch,"I'm American, honey. Our names don't mean shit."  
 
Vincent,"Want some bacon?"
Jules,"No man,I dont eat pork."
Vincent,"Are you Jewish?"
Jules,"Nah,I aint Jewish.I just dont dig on swine.That's all."
Vincent,"Why not?"
Jules,"Pigs are filthy animals.I dont eat filthy animals."
Vincent,"Bacon tastes gooood.Pork Chop tastes gooood."
Jules,"Hey, sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'd never know 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherfucker. Pigs sleep and root in shit. That's a filthy animal. I ain't eat nothin' that ain't got enough sense enough to disregard its own faeces."
Vincent,"How about dogs?Dogs eats its own faeces."
Jules,"I don't eat dog either."
Vincent,"Yeah, but do you consider a dog to be a filthy animal?"
Jules,"I wouldn't go so far as to call a dog filthy but they're definitely dirty. But, a dog's got personality. Personality goes a long way."
Vincent,"Ah, so by that rationale, if a pig had a better personality, he would cease to be a filthy animal. Is that true?"
Jules,"Well we'd have to be talkin' about one charmin' motherfuckin' pig. I mean he'd have to be ten times more charmin' than that Arnold on Green Acres, you know what I'm sayin'?"
 
[Jules and Vinnie take Marvin with them in their car and Vinnie's gun goes off and blows Marvin's head off]
Vincent,"Woah!"
Jules,"What the fuck's happening, man? Ah, shit man!"
Vincent,"Oh man, I shot Marvin in the face."
Jules,"Why the fuck did you do that!" 
Vincent,"Well, I didn't mean to do it, it was an accident!"
Jules,"Oh man I've seen some crazy ass shit in my time... "
Vincent,"Chill out, man. I told you it was an accident. You probably went over a bump or something."
Jules,"Hey, the car didn't hit no motherfucking bump."
Vincent,"Hey, look man, I didn't mean to shoot the son of a bitch. The gun went off. I don't know why."
Jules,"Well look at this fucking mess, man. We're on a city street in broad daylight here!"
Vincent,"I don't believe it."
Jules,"Well believe it now, motherfucker! We gotta get this car off the road! You know cops tend to notice shit like you're driving a car drenched in fucking blood."
Vincent,"Just take it to a friendly place, that's all."
Jules,"This in the Valley, Vincent. Marcellus ain't got no friendly places in the Valley."
Vincent,"Well Jules this ain't my fucking town, man!"
Jules,"Shit!"
[Jules dials a number on his cell phone]  
Vincent,"What you doin'?"
Jules,"I'm calling my partner in Toluca Lake."
Vincent,"Where's Toluca Lake? "
Jules,"It's just over the hill here over by Burbank Studios. If Jimmie's ass ain't home, I don't know what the fuck we're going to do, man. 'Cause I ain't got no other partners in 8-1-8. Hey Jimmie, yo, how you doin', man? It's Jules. Listen up man. Me and my homeboy are in serious fucking shit. We're in a car and we gotta get off the road, pronto. I need to use your garage for a couple of hours."
 
[Jules and Vincent cleaning up the blood covered car]
Jules,"Oh man, I will never forgive yo ass for this. This is some fucked-up, repugnant shit."
Vincent,"Jules, did you ever hear the philosophy that once a man admits he's wrong, then he's immediately forgiven for all wrongdoing?"
Jules,"Get the fuck out of my face with that shit.The motherfucker who said that never had to pick up itty bitty pieces of skull on account of your dumb ass."
Vincent,"I got a threshold, Jules. I got a threshold for the abuse I'll take.And right now I'm a fucking race car,alright?And you got me in the red.And Im just saying,Im just saying,that it's fuckin' dangerous to have a racecar in the fuckin' red,that's all.It could blow."
Jules,"Oh, you're gettin' ready to blow?"
Vincent,"Yeah,Im ready to blow."
Jules,"Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-layin' motherfucker, motherfucker! Every time my fingers touch brain I'm "SUPERFLY T.N.T", I'm the "GUNS OF THE NAVARONE". In fact, what the fuck am I doin' in the back? You're the motherfucker should be on brain detail. We're fuckin' switchin' . I'm washin' the windows and you're pickin' up this nigger's skull."    
 
Winston Wolf,"What do they look like Jimmie?"
Jimmie,"Dorks.They look like dorks."
Jules,"(Sarcasticly)Ha Ha Ha,they are your clothes,motherfucker."
 
Jules,"Whoa... whoa... whoa... stop right there. Eatin' a bitch out, and givin' a bitch a foot massage ain't even the same fuckin' thing."
Vincent,"Not the same thing, the same ballpark."
Jules,"It ain't no fuckin' ballpark either. Now look, maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but touchin' his wife's feet, and stickin' your tongue in her holyiest of holies, ain't the same ballpark, it ain't the same league, it ain't even the same fuckin' sport. Foot massages don't mean shit."
Vincent,"Have you ever given a foot massage?"
Jules,"Don't be tellin' me about foot massages - I'm the foot fuckin' master."
 
Vincent,"And you know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?"
Jules,"They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with cheese?"
Vincent,"No man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the fuck a Quarter Pounder is."
Jules,"Then what do they call it? "
Vincent,"They call it a "Royale" with cheese."
Jules,"A "Royale" with cheese. What do they call a Big Mac?"
Vincent,"Well, a Big Mac's a Big Mac, but they call it "le Big-Mac"."
Jules,""Le Big-Mac". Ha ha ha ha. What do they call a Whopper?"
Vincent,"I dunno, I didn't go into Burger King."
 
Mia,"Don't you hate that?"
Vincent,"What?"
Mia,"Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?"
Vincent,"I don't know. That's a good question."
Mia,"That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence."
---'Pulp Fiction'(1994)
 
Song of the Moment---Poprocks and Coke by GreenDay