Of the Wrong Road
The following account happened subconsciously and should only be taken as an analogy
An empty road is before you,and you are in your car,all excited to press down on that pedal.Your heart is beating,and your mind is a blank.All you wanted to do was to drive down this stretch of road without much thinking.And so you adjusted your gear,and placed your sweaty palms on the wheels and with a deep breath you exerted force on the pedal.With a loud roar from the engine the car speeds down the road at full speed.You feel free and refreshed,and it was that sort of feeling that makes you feel as if you are flying.Then you come to a junction.You chose one of them and continued your joy ride.As you drove o,you felt that the road is a lot rougher,and your car is not moving along as fast as you hoped for.You looked over the edge of your car,and see pebbles and rocks underneath your wheels.You want to turn back,but since you are halfway through you might as well go on.The pebbles grew bigger as you went on,and you literally started to jump in your seat.The car slowed down to a crawl,and your pressed on the pedal harder.The car sped on,and without notice it caught a rock in the wheels and the car flipped over.It spunned in the air once,twice,trice.With a bang it landed on its back and you flew out of your car.Of course,this all happens subconsciously."Damn!" you thought,as you brushed the dust off your arms."I shouldve taken the other road."you screamed.

Damn.Thinking back,i shouldve went to polytechnic instead of a Junior College.I do have friends there,and some of them are doing courses that are so much closer to my interest and my live,that i wonder why i never chose to go there in the first place.A friend of mine is doing film studies,and his homework is to write scripts and to film short movies.Another friend of mine met a couple of music enthusiasts and learned so much about guitar its amazing.Come to think about it,why am i not there?I mean,i am so suited there than i am now here.Not that i am saying that whatever i am learning now is useless whatsoever.In fact,the opportunities you get with learning maths,economics,chemistry and physics is so much higher than whatever i am interested in.(Save for Geography.Utterly useless other than increasing your general knowledge and being a Geography teacher.Great career choice.)Thinking back,those courses in Polytechnic seems to be made for me.Haha.Of course,it is ridiculous to say that,but it is where i want to go now.The worst thing is,i am only realising this halfway through my JC studies.Great huh.Finding how wrong i am only halfway through the mistake.I shouldve done this,i shouldve done that.Shouldve,wouldve,couldve.All the regrets.What the hell am i doing here,like my friend Shariffah used to say when her results are not desireable.What the hell am i doing in this shithole.It is on totally different side of the "Interest" scale that i am wondering why i even bothered to go there.Two years in NS,enough time for me to think it through.Had a chat with my mom,and she adviced me to look before myself at the As and decide later.Two years for soul searching,is indeed a long time.I wonder if i have time to search for my soul at all,considering the fact that i might be busy searching for my limbs on the battlefields.Discouraging thought.Leave it.Life sucks.I seldom say that,but life really sucks now.

Song of the Moment---This Year by Chantal Kreviazuk