Of Intimidation
Intimidation.Hmm.Where should i start describing this feeling?To feel that someone is looking down on you,through words or actions?Perhaps both.Sometimes,they are taken as jokes,especially between friends.You hear thos comments and they do something to you,and thats that.Its over.However,if a teacher does intimidating things to you,it feels bad,and you get frustrated.You feel like pulling her hair out one by one.After all,we as students,has our rights and dignity.And we represent our own dignity and they are not for you to step on.Yes,you are the teacher of the class,you have the power to command.Do this,do that.Dont do this,dont do that.However,im sure intimidating your students is part of your quota.Why am i saying that?Well,our teacher who's name i will keep disclosed made me feel like i am her dog.During CT,we had this merged meeting session with A1 class.They are nice people,with an extremely nice teacher to add on to that.So we were in the GP room,all excited to get started about our "Love Talk".I grouped with WenLai,Meiling,Weiyi and some girls from A1.I think their names are Sabrina Katheleen and Diana?Not sure at all.Anyway,so there i was talking to WenLai,since everything's still in a mess.Miss * came over as Mr Teo started talking.I was still talking to WenLai,however,she kneeled on me like i am some cushion and asked me to keep quiet.You couldve left the first part out.The previous CT period,i forgot to pass up the mini inter class competition about school history and goals.Fine.My fault.I am the irresponsible CT Rep.I dont want to ask JiaYing to do it,since she's already busy enough with her tennis.And if i think i am capable of doing it,i prefer to do things on my own.Yes,i forgot to pass it up.Short circuit within my mind.Sorry.I apologised.What did you do?You stepped on me.Literally.She was walking down the small stage in the GP room and she stepped on my right thighs.It wasnt painful or anything,but i felt so intimidated by her i also sliced her toes off.She continued as if nothing happened and i just laughed it off.However,deep inside i was on the verge of grabbing the nearest sharp object that i can find and cut her throat and watch the blood gush out of her opened wound,slowing bleeding to death on the ground.But nevermind,my anger comes fast,leaves faster.Until today when she did it again.I got really pissed at her.To my surprise,i am not the only one who dislikes her.Valerie has some disagreements with her,Sam's pretty pissed with her due to the extra workload placed on her and the rest of the debating team.JiaYing had something going on between her and Miss * that she wouldnt mention.Fine.Even if i am the only person with hatred,i dont care.We want our own CT back.He cared nothing about us and left,but at least we felt welcomed and cared by.Not intimidation.Not like you.Next time when you see me,look into my eyes.What do you see?What do you see?Very soon,everyone will be looking at you like i do.And soon enough,you will find no hole to hide your pathetic soul.Because when that day comes,nobody will be facing you but your own pathetic reflection in the mirror.Look at yourself.Intimidating the students.

Story of the Day

Of Tree,Leaf and Wind.(2 of 3)

On a lighter note,this is the story of leaf,the girl Tree is after.Check it out.

Leaf

During Pre-U days, I like to collect leaves. Why? Because I felt that for a leaf to leave the tree she has been relying on for so long it takes a lot of courage. During the 3 years of Pre-U I was on very close terms with a guy. Not BGR kind but as buddy kind. But when he had his 1st girlfriend, I learnt a feeling I never should have learnt - Jealousy. The sourness in the heart can't be describe by using a lemon. It's like 100 rotten sour lemon. Sourness to the extreme limit. They were only together for 2 mths. When they broke up, I hide my strong sense of happiness. But after a mth, he got together with another gal.
I like him & I know he like me. But why won't he pursue me? Since he love me why he doesn't want to make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt. Time after time, my heart was hurt. I begin to suspect that this is a one sided love. If he don't like he, why does he treat me so well. It's beyond what you will normally do for a friend. Liking a person is very heart wrenching. I can know his likes, his habits. But his feelings towards me I can never figure out. You can't expect me a gal to ask him right?
Despite that, I still want to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, love him. Hoping that one fine day, he will come & love me. It's like waiting for his phone call every night, wanting him to send me sms. I know that no matter how busy he is, he will make time for me. Because of this, I waited for him. The 3 years were the hardest to go through & I really want to give up. Sometimes, I wonder should I continue waiting. The pain and hurt, the dilemma accompany me for 3 years.
Till the end of my 3rd year, a 2nd year junior begins to go after me. Everyday he pursuit me relentlessly. From outright rejection to a point in time when I felt that I'm willing to let him have a small footing in my heart. He's like a warm & gentle wind, trying to blow a leaf away from the tree. In the end, I realized that I didn't want to give this wind a small footing in my heart. I know this wind will bring this badly battered leave far away & better land. Finally I left tree, but the tree only smile & didn't ask me to stay. Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay.